And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
