Your tits are I can't wait for
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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