don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
