Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
