'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
