one might say we're banned from that church
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
