And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize