Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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