Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Randomize
