oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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