If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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