Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You made out with two different species that night
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
