It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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