drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
