Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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