So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
It's rum buckets o'clock
It's no shave November. This is our time.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
