im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
