He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
