Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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