Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize