her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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