I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
You dont lie about slip and slides
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
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