be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
