i can't believe i had my finger in that
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just invented taco cereal.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
