capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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