I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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