So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
