I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
