your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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