Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
