We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
