were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
