I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Randomize