just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
