He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
