You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
