So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I touched a dick in church today
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
