I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
