Well apparently he's into motor boating.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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