I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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