It's Friday. Sex?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
