I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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