Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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