I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
