Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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