I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
