is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
