And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
