i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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