You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
