i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
