Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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